Believing anyway…

A couple of weekends ago we arrived at the cabin in Big Bear in the dark. Excitedly, and with her legs somewhat crossed, after the longish drive, the dog ran straight through the cabin and scratched on the rear door to be let out into the yard. It was very dark given we had not yet turned on all the lights but I let her out and because we always worry more about coyotes than bears I follow her so we could both be dinner for the forest wild life.

As I wait on the small deck in the pitch black the most incredible scent strikes me. It had the kind of intensity as if someone had stuck a glade air freshener under my nose but it was actually more pleasant than that. I was however completely perplexed as to where this strong scent might be coming from as our yard in Big Bear is pretty barren, so I grab the small torch that we keep on the back of the door and shine the light in a swift arm sweep across the garden. To huge surprise what were barren stalks and sticks only two weeks prior were now large broad bushes in full bloom! The garden was completely and abundantly full of lilac.

A few things struck me in my awe. Firstly, I wondered if I would have been so attentive to the perfume if my eyes had first set eyes on the lilac. I could imagine walking into the cabin in daylight, looking out the window at the blooms, being pleasantly surprised and moving on. It was the very fact that I couldn’t see, which made this experience so delightful.

The second thought was that I had recently been having one of ‘those’ conversations about having faith in an entity even when you don’t have visual evidence of it. The conversation actually featured around the ocean that had mysteriously vanished with some early Laguna Beach ‘June gloom’. Just because we couldn’t see the Ocean was there any reason to believe that it wasn’t there? Obviously our rational selves could say of course it is there, and yet in the conversation we were observing how quick we are to simply choose to believe that some things in life don’t exist just because we can’t see them in that moment.

The blooms in Big Bear didn’t exist when I was last at the cabin, I wasn’t expecting them and therefore when I smelled them I still didn’t believe in what I was sensing until I shone the light and saw them. We have coined the phrase ‘you won’t believe it until you see it’..but why is that true? Even though the scent snuck up on me why was I not content just to know that the garden was full of blooms given my sense of smell, quickly followed by my intuition, were telling me so. What was so compelling and satisfying about seeing it with my own eyes? Did it make it any more real?

So this week I am being open. Open to the idea that maybe I need to be less reliant on the notion that I need to ‘see it to believe it’ and just be more respectful and trusting of each of my other senses that tells me something exists.

I promise to let you know if I sniff out any further delights!!
Candice

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