Archive for October, 2008

Dance for the World

I love dancing and I love hearing about creative ways people are making a difference in the
world. So when I heard about “ Dance for the World “ I knew I had to share.

In the month of November all across Canada, people will be “ Dancing for the World.” Dance For The World is a national fundraising campaign in support of CUSO and VSO Canada’s Volunteer Partnership Fund. The campaign works through individuals and teams who join together to fundraise during the months of October and November. Individuals can collect dance pledges and gather friends and family to form Dance Teams to participate in Dance for the World events.

Teams are formed by friends, families and coworkers. They’re challenged to set group fundraising targets and come out to Dance for the World. Many teams invite local dance groups and schools to their homes and offices to learn new dance styles – belly dance anyone? – to show off at the November Gala events. Even if you don’t want to dance you can still raise funds as a team to resource volunteer projects in the field.

The grand finale of the Dance for the World Campaign are the Gala Events, held this year in Vancouver, Calgary, Toronto, Ottawa, Montreal, Halifax and Charlottetown. Hundreds will converge at these cities’ hottest clubs and dance halls for an evening of dance, cultural exchange and great entertainment – all while helping to make the world a better place to live, work and dance for all.

All proceeds from the Dance for the World Campaign will support CUSO and VSO overseas volunteers in their work to combat poverty and build connections in 44 countries around the world.

For those of you who don’t live in Canada, it’s time to get creative.
– Make a donation, tell a local dance troupe in your area so they can be involved.
– Create a your own fun “Dance for the World” routine, and put it on You Tube to get the word out.
– Link it on your Facebook page .
– Go all out and have your own Gala Event.

There are many creative ideas for being involved on their website www.dancefortheworld.com Please also visit www.cuso.org and www.vsocan.org to find out about their volunteer programs and partnerships with communities around the world.

If you are fortunate enough to live in Vancouver, Calgary, Toronto, Ottawa, Montreal, Halifax, or Charlottetown check out the Gala Events in your city. Tell your friends and family and coworkers. Plan to attend or volunteer to help at a Gala. There are many ways to dance and become global citizens one step at a time.

Keep dancing
Penny

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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Wishes Big Enough to Change the World

For those of you that follow TED this will be 10 day old news, but maybe you didn’t read the announcement yet?! And for everyone else I really wanted to share the news. As you might remember the Pangea Day Film Festival that was an incredibly impactful event was the result of a Ted Prize; a wish to unite the world in realtime through film.

“The TED Prize is designed to leverage the TED community’s exceptional array of talent and resources. It is awarded annually to three exceptional individuals who each receive $100,000 and, much more important, the granting of “One Wish to Change the World.” After several months of preparation, they unveil their wish at an award ceremony held during the TED Conference. These wishes have led to collaborative initiatives with far-reaching impact.” Source Tedprize.org

This year the TED prize winners are –

Sylvia Earle– Deep ocean explorer & dedicated advocate for the world’s oceans and the creatures that live in them.

Jill Cornell Tarter – Astronomer and Director of the SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence)

José Antonio Abreu – Maestro who changes the lives of Venezeulan Children through music.

I highly recommend that you read the full details at tedprize.org

Now if you are new to TED I would also encourage you to join the network, you will then be sent the most incredible short videos that are the sessions from each of the thought leaders that talk at the TED Conferences, they are very inspiring.

I really look forward to 2009 and hearing what these visionary individuals wish for and how it will positively change the world.

What would you wish for?
Have an incredible week.
Candice

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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The nourishment of asserting yourself

It is interesting that so many of us get stuck in a difficult relationship or situation because of our belief that the only way to handle it is to ignore the challenge (often to our detriment) or by behaving passive-aggressively or just aggressively.

I assure you there is another option which is to be assertive; acting in a way to get what one is entitled to and not at the expense of another’s rights. This is also very useful for those of us that get swept up in a wave of guilt when all we want to do is say ‘no’ to someone.

If this is foreign territory to you then you will be pleased to know that there are some steps that can be learned. Firstly be mindful of your body posture, assertiveness is conveyed in direct eye contact, standing steady and speaking clearly with confidence. Now just follow the outline script –

a. Describe the situation
Very briefly paint the picture of the other person’s behavior or of the situation that has you upset or has you compelled to say no. This would begin with something such as “When others give my team updated information without my knowledge I am undermined….”

b. Express yourself
Relate your feelings using only the ‘I’ format.
” I feel…”

c. Specify
Be very specific about ways in which you would like the other person’s behavior or the situation to change, and the key here is not to use ‘YOU’ as it places folks in a defensive mode, instead use statements such as ‘I would prefer….’, ‘I would like’….’I want to be able….’

d. Consequence
Outline a consequence that you will apply to the behavior or situation. What will you do if the person’s behavior or situation changes to your satisfaction? What is the reward for you both? What will be the consequences if nothing changes or if the change does not meet your needs?

Please note that when you get to ‘consequences’ being authentically assertive is what is important here, it is no time for drama; we want to avoid anything you say being misconstrued as an idle threat. A simple consequence could be ‘And then I think we’ll get along better..”.

Putting this all together in one scenario might look like –
“(a) When others give my team updated information without my knowledge I am undermined (b) and I feel frustrated. (c) I would prefer we agree that all communications will now only go through me (d) and when this occurs I will personally make sure that you and others around the team are kept in the loop.”

If the agreement is broken the assertion may being to look like –
“(a) Others remain to communicate to my team directly and I continue to be undermined, (b) I feel that this is a very ineffective way to work and I continue to feel frustrated and stressed (c) I need to know that actions will be taken for all team communications to go through me (d) I feel very strongly about the importance of our working relationships and my right in this role to control the important communications and if this cannot be resolved I will require a new role”.

Repetition is actually pretty effective in being assertive and when used correctly can really make a difference. Remember not to ‘blame’ and use ‘you’ and another helpful hint is to use ‘and’ and not ‘but’. Using ‘but’ in a sentence acts like an eraser of what has just been said which we often interpret as being disrespectful or as not being listened to. Many blow ups can be avoided simply by exchanging ‘but’ for ‘and’ as it prevents an either/or situation, instead it opens up dialogue. One person can have his/her own truth AND another can have theirs.

As we go into the weekend, look at the things that are causing you angst or that you feel unnecessarily guilty about then choose to assert yourself instead.

Feel good about standing up for yourself.
Candice

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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Tribes

I was excited to receive my pre-ordered copy of Seth Godin’s ‘Tribes – we need you to lead us’ this week.

In it Godin writes ” Tribes are about faith – about belief in an idea and in a community. And they are grounded in respect and admiration for the leader of the tribe and for the other members as well. …There are tribes everywhere now, inside and outside of organizations, in public and private in nonprofit, in classrooms, across the planet. Every one of these tribes is yearning for leadership and connection.”

I am writing this post from Austin, Texas and no where were tribes more prevalent than yesterday around the UT campus where we mixed with several thousand Texas Longhorn fans; all proudly demonstrating their belonging through their colorful orange apparel. Obviously those of us living in the U.S are also witnessing distinct political tribes too, each very loyal to their beliefs and leader.

This started me thinking about tribes to which I personally belong.

I am confident in stating that I am part of the Apple Mac tribe, I am brand loyal and ‘mac people’ tend to be fanatical about products and the mac experience, we connect easily to one another on the street, on planes and at the ‘genius bar’. Steve Jobs is the most identifiable leader though I think many of us would say our tribal alliance is as much to do with Ives’ design leadership.

I also feel part of the tribe that congregates at Art Center School of design for the biannual conference, the thousand or so of us that attend speak the same language. The British Tribe is one I was born into and comes into play every now and then; get a bunch of Brits in a bar abroad and we will gravitate to one another, a tribe based on irony and humor. I am a Coach so there is a tribe of coaches that I suppose I belong to and even though I am about to take a board position at one of the ICF Chapters I am not quite at the point of embracing it at tribe status yet. Isn’t it interesting that as social animals we have a keen awareness of who ‘our people are’ and I think there are many smaller tribes as part of that organization to which I am still investigating my allegiance. Even if we are natural social butterflies or have jobs that involve us meeting a broad spectrum of society we will still have strong tribal associations and that feeling of ‘belonging’ with others.

Social networking has broadened the possibility of tribes, no longer do they need to be geographical. I am part of a few social network tribes including Facebook. At first glance social network tribes seem to be more of a catalyst model than a leadership model, I don’t think we are looking for a leader when we join these groups or are we?

In doing this exercise I started to understand what Godin was saying when he stated that the majority of tribes are looking for connection and leadership. For example I don’t have leadership in my eco interests. There are a few figure heads but I don’t consider myself part of a tribe even though there are some borderline tribal behaviors if we care to count subscriptions to special interest magazines. I wonder if I were part of an eco tribe if my quest to build an eco friendly home would be easier. Maybe I need a tribe! It is an interesting way of looking at it. Wow, imagine it, a new home project ‘grounded in respect and admiration’! Could it really be?

Edwin H. Friedman wrote – “Leadership can be thought of as a capacity to define oneself to others in a way that clarifies and expands a vision of the future.” I think this is an interesting perspective on leadership. It feels intuitive and positive and something we can all do.

It became apparent to me that the concept behind The Cooperative and this blog was one about tribe. I have a vision around connecting people with similar ideas so that we can all share knowledge and learn to live well, simply and vibrantly and the community is really beginning to take shape. Don’t worry you won’t be asked to come help me build my home anytime soon……mmmmmm…or is that strictly true??

This week take a moment to notice to which tribes you belong, where leadership might be lacking and where YOU will choose to lead.

Candice

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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Noticing what wants to happen….

Ever tried to get something done and felt like you were banging your head against a brick wall? Ever been frustrated that things just aren’t going the way you want it to? Not sure why some things just seem so hard?

If so, instead of boiling over or suffering in silence did you ever just press pause, take a step back and notice what is ‘wanting to happen’?

We sometimes get wrapped up in the belief that we need to hold onto projects, relationships, finances and other aspects of our life very very tightly, but what are the possibilites if we let go a little and give what ever it is some breathing room?

Firstly, I will assure you that you will feel a hell of a lot better, even those ‘Type A’ masters of control out there will reap the benefits of loosening the grip the little. The second thing that will happen is that you will now have some space so that you can actually notice the signals of what wants to happen.

OK so at first glance it might seem in some cases that it is chaos that wants to happen or possibly a relationship wants to end but what if a little mess was what was needed to discover a new solution and what if those involved would actually benefit from the relationship ending? You may also notice that a burden may get lifted, a goal may be attained with more ease, you get the opportunity to course correct and a little magic could be created.

Try it. Look at the areas of your life where you are possibly struggling or holding on too tight. Think about the situation and ask yourself ‘What is wanting to happen here?’…..

I promise you there will be wisdom there.
Candice

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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Knowing your little one is in good hands…

Sitter Socials is a service that connects parents to babysitters in two ways.

First, a ‘Sitter Social Event’, held at local boutiques where you will socialize, snack, shop and “speed meet” all the sitters attending. Second, the Sitter Socials database is available to you for all your future needs. One company, two ways to connect.

Orange County’s first Sitter Social was held at the beginning of October at Bears, Buddies & Toys in Laguna Niguel and to hear about other events in your city you can visit: sittersocials.com
(Membership starts at $49.99, see website for details)

While we are on the child theme this week, you may want to check out Oasis Child in Laguna Beach, not only do they have cool clothes for mom, toddlers, babies and any female who likes cool t-shirts and pants but they also have a studio space where they hold yoga for toddlers and other family well being activities. Check out Oasis Child for more information.

Have a wonderful week knowing that there are a couple more child friendly resources out there!
C

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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‘The Garden’ – The story of a South Central Farm

Even if you can’t go yourself, this film event sounds incredibly interesting and very powerful so please pass along the information to anyone who you may feel will be interested in attending next Thursday.
‘The Garden’ is an award-winning documentary that chronicles the complex and emotional story of the destruction of Los Angeles’ South Central Farm. Created from the ashes of the L.A. riots in 1992, the South Central Farm was the largest urban farm in the United States until its destruction in 2006. “The Garden” follows the farmers as they organize and launch an impassioned public battle to save the farm. The film documents the farmers’ struggle against the city’s backroom deals, and exposes the underlying issues of money, power, poverty and racial discord. The film explores the fault lines in American society, raising crucial and challenging questions about liberty, equality, and justice for the poorest and most vulnerable among us.

“The Garden” won a Sterling Award for best U.S. feature at the 2008 SILVERDOCS. The jury praised the film for “its tenacity in storytelling in the face of injustice, and the filmmaker’s singular vision in bringing a gripping, dramatic, and important story to the public eye.” The Los Angeles Times calls it “an excellent documentary. . . its lessons about the levers of power and politics, about rebels becoming the establishment and how easy it is to get co-opted, are relevant everywhere. A potent human drama, “The Garden” is a case study in how hardball politics is played and why it is so difficult to take on the system.”

To see a preview of the film (get ready for the goosebumps), visit: blackvalleyfilms.com

THE MAK URBAN FUTURE INITIATIVE PRESENTS:
A Screening of “The Garden”
The award-winning documentary about the South Central Farm. Followed by Q & A with filmmaker Scott Hamilton Kennedy and South Central Farmers representative Tezozomoc
Thursday, October 16
Reception at 6:30 pm
Screening at 7:15 pm
MAK Center for Art and Architecture, Los Angeles
Schindler House
835 North Kings Road
West Hollywood, CA 90069
Admission is $7; $6 for seniors and students with valid I.D.; and free for Friends of the Schindler House. Reservations are recommended. Please RSVP for this event by calling (323) 651-1510 or by email at office@makcenter.org.

Photograph by Don Normark

© The Red Barn Cooperative – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chiclet up on the right…

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