It’s all about perspective

This week it felt as if all perspectives were traveling-in-pairs. They just kept showing up that way; both true and both valid. Then this riddle reappeared too. What do you see? A rabbit or a duck?

Taking the time to appreciate the duck when you are currently only seeing the rabbit, might be just what is required this weekend. There is always more than one truth.
Have a great one.
Candice

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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Designing your relationship

September is a busy month at Red Barn. Just on the heels of the launch of RBC ONE, couples in the San Diego area are getting the opportunity to attend our workshop series on Relationship by Design.

What does your own relationship look like?

Have you and your partner spent the time to discuss what’s truly important to the two of you, or how you want to be with each other when it gets difficult? How do you relate as a couple to finances, careers, child rearing or stress? Creating an inspired, fun, warm, loving relationship (and all the other things you want it to be) takes time, energy and tools.

Listening tools, on average most of us hear 25-50 % of what our partner says to us.

Awareness tools, how emotionally intelligent would you say you & your partner are?

Discovery tools, how well do you really know your partner and their inner world?

These are just some of the tools and topics we will be exploring.

Workshops will be held on
Saturday September 19, and Saturday, October 10 @ 10:00 am
at
Chapman University
Room 104
7460 Mission Valley Road
San Diego 92108

For more information on taking part please email penny@redbarncoaching.com or call 619-990-1650

Please pass this information on to those who may be interested in attending.
Looking forward it!
Penny

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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Kindred spirit

It’s been a very big week…time for a snooze.
We did however find a kindred spirit in London! Check out The School of life.

Very cool!
Have a fabulous weekend.
C

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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A fifth season?

Every now and then I am harshly aware that I am ‘not from here’. Labor day is one of those occasions. In Britain we observe Labour Day on May 1, so it has absolutely nothing to do with the last Summer BBQ, getting ready for school or a quick last summer getaway.

It is very interesting to me, that this day, which is actually supposed to signify a stand for the 8 hour cycle – 8 hours of labor, 8 hours of recreation and 8 hours of rest, signifies something very different in the U.S . All week I have been reading the line ‘now summer is over’… which makes me wonder about the 15 days between 7th September and the 22nd September which is actually the first day of Autumn (because again I am not from here…). Do we actually have a stealth fifth season in the U.S? A pre-fall ? Or a post-Summer? It may just be me but it feels that this year folks are in an extra hurry to say goodbye to Summer.

It also makes me curious. If this weekend does signify a seasonal, or pace of life change for you, what will you remember about Summer 2009? What were your achievements? What were some of the not so great things that happened and the associated learning? Who did you hang out with, who did you play with, what new places did you explore and who did you fall in love with, for the first time, or all over again?

If Summer is almost over, then at least pause for a moment and take one last huge gulp of it and notice what it meant for you. Resist the temptation to rush into fall; the pumpkins can wait. Instead just stop right here for a little while, take a deep breath and notice what you are consciously leaving behind in Summer ’09 and what you will be choosing to take forward with you through that gateway of transitioning seasons.

On September 22nd, I will welcome the new season with open arms, but today I embrace what is here.
Candice

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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Red Barn Cooperative evolves

If you have been following this blog for a while you are probably aware that The Red Barn Cooperative is a Red Barn Coaching initiative, a seed of an idea about a cooperative of people coming together with the common goal of providing nourishment, in all it’s guises, to the world’s communities.

The dialogue and ideas we share on this blog culminate The Red Barn vision; it began as an invitation to, coaches, wellness professionals, educators, eco warriors, visionaries, industrial designers, growers of produce, and anyone with a will to nourish minds, hearts, bodies and souls to contribute their knowledge so we can all learn to live well, simply and vibrantly.

The broader dream and vision is to physically bring together a cooperative of trades under one roof. A place where you would feel rejuvenated by walking through a stand of fresh flowers, where you could sip a cup of coffee, purchase organic produce, visit an eco store, have a coaching session, get a massage and take part in some physical fitness, Martial Arts, Pilates or other modalities.

This blog was the first manifestation of that dream and I always imagined the cooperative coming together in the order that it flowed in my mind, I even spoke with a florist to see if we could co-locate our businesses. So with my own personal reluctance to attend a gym, I didn’t ever expect that it would be the ‘body’ part of this vision that would arrive first, but then I didn’t imagine that two close friends would have similar dreams and want to purchase the Pilates and Gyrotonic business above my office.

After approximately 6 weeks of owning that business, today the three of us find ourselves 12 days out from the launch of ‘RBC ONE‘, a simple cooperative approach to the healthy care of your mind, body, spirit and heart.

The concept is a simple one. Our awesome clients arrive at the space and choose their activity, (Life coaching, Business Coaching, Pilates, Gyrotonic or Stress Management) & meet their instructor/teacher or coach to experience beneficial & rewarding results.

If they are just looking to increase their core strength with a Pilates teacher, that’s great, and if they wish to combine that with some additional stress management tools – that works too. Maybe they are wondering about nutrition, and if that is the case they can drop into one of our monthly ‘whole health’ educational events on the topic. We will also have monthly ‘Community Table’ events where folks can just drop in and take part in our ‘wish bowl’ activity, where we will talk about what is needed or desired in our lives – quite possibly over a glass of wine!

RBC One has a diverse team, 9 people strong, working across many healthy disciplines that include Pilates, Gyrotonic, Co-Active coaching and educational platforms. With each encouraging professional able to design a quality, personalized experience for each client entirely based on their wants, needs and goals.

We launch on 09.09.09 at 6.30pm, an auspicious date and time! And if you are local we would love to see you at our small soiree just RSVP to rsvp@rbcone.com.

So while we may not have a florist at our entrance, we do have the beginnings of a charming herb garden and I thank you all for being part of that original seed of an idea. For reading this blog, and being here today as we embark on the next chapter of the cooperative; creating a healthy resource, and integrated approach to the care of our lives. I appreciate you very much.

Looking forward to my own Pilates session, with one of our wonderful teachers in the morning!
C

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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Squirrels and bears

In 1956 John Osbourne wrote ‘Look Back in Anger’, you may have seen the 1958 film with Richard Burton, Claire Bloom and Mary Ure. The play was originally produced at London’s Royal Court Theatre, with the press release calling the author ‘an angry young man’, a phrase which came to represent a new movement in 1950s British theatre. Having been the Theater Manager at the Royal Court Theatre back in 1992/93, this is pretty interesting to me, but it is not the reason for this post.

What actually made me think of this play is the last act. The play revolves around two main characters who have a very challenging relationship, but in the last act a truce is called and the couple begin a sort of ritulistic game, lost in their own world, where they become ‘squirrels and bears’. Many couples and relationships create a language of their own in which they find comfort and friendship and in this house we have our bakery items.

This weekend I leave for New York and have an early morning flight but we won’t talk about that. Instead we will use our own language around my departure time which involves souffles, marshmallows and cupcakes. It is a language we developed many years ago and it works as follows. The more ‘treat like’ the bakery item the earlier the time. We never say we have to get up at 5am, instead we will say ‘souffle o’clock’. And if we need to leave the house at 6.15 that is marshmallow.15 and a flight might leave at cupcake.45.

Call it eccentric if you will, we however call it a very savvy coping mechanism. Neither of us want to go to bed thinking about the sharp truth of the hour, we would much rather drift into (forgive the pun), sweet dreams.

Calling something what it is, is usually the most honest, authentic thing to do, and then there are the times when softening the edges is just what is required.

What might you want to soften the edge of this weekend?
C

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

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Who gets you dressed in the morning?

I enjoy Thursdays.

On a Thursday the majority of my clients are via phone or Skype, and the ones who I do see face to face are those that (I like to think), have strong foundations built on trust. So among other joys it means that within reason, I can wear pretty much what I like to the office and just like a news anchor, for the people I Skype with, I just need a very presentable top half!

It seems somehow archaic that we are still often judged by what we wear, and a little sad that I will sometimes catch myself bowing to some of these pressures. Coaching an executive around leadership, you bet I will be found wearing something a little more ‘structured’. And I have completely taken on board Stacy and Clinton’s advice in regard to length of skirts, and my particular favorite, that toe cleavage is ‘still cleavage’!

I do however wonder if these considerations are for my perceived client’s comfort or only mine. Dress can definitely be a prop for us, and our outfits will often indicate the role we are choosing to occupy; mother, working professional, flirty date. Actors use ‘costume’ to help them find character, so why wouldn’t we be influenced by what we wear in any given setting?

Yesterday as I was mid coaching session, I believe I was swirling around a special edition ‘David Beckham Sharpie’ in a complex Olive color, when the client stopped and stared at a large ring I was wearing, commenting that it didn’t seem to fit my personality. I assure you this is not what you need during a session where you are supporting someone with their life. In that moment I could have got curious about why this person thought this, in fact I am still curious about why they thought this. It is a piece of jewelry I am extremely fond of, instead I took the alternative route of muttering something about the observation and moved on with the exercise.

I want for all RBC clients to arrive at our coaching space and find new ways of looking at things, to open their minds and experiment, and to do that I feel that coach and venue need to set the scene to promote that behavior, but not have so much personality that it gets in the way. That ring may need to stop coming to the office..IT may have too much personality??!

I have my own curious relationship with the color of clothes. When I imagine my future self, she is wearing white and ivory colors. I even made a recent commitment to only buy clothes in these colors because when I wear clothes in these tones I do leverage that serene energy from my future self. It is a structure and cue for me to show up a certain way. Would these clothes work in that executive coaching session? Yes I think so, we are not talking flowing garb here, my future self doesn’t suddenly turn into a glowing organic mother earth. These lighter color clothes can still have structure and convey a certain professional togetherness which feels like me.

I have been known to set clients homework around the way they choose to dress; they may choose to express their dormant outrageous self, add more eclectic accessories, or explore that more feminine side that they have been hiding from the world in fear of criticism or too much attention.

I have a friend who lives by the Coco Chanel quote “Dress shabbily and they notice the dress. Dress impeccably and they notice the woman.” I would like to add to that and say, dress consciously and purposefully, and you will shine. Your wardrobe could be your cue to show up as the person you want to be that day, and yes, that ring will be worn to the office once more.

Have a good look in your wardrobe this weekend, are its contents reflective of you?
C
P.S this is not about having more clothes, in fact it is more likely to be about paring down. For inspiration to do that check out www.theuniformproject.com, quite a fun and disciplined approach!

© RBC – Working together to nourish lives
A Red Barn Coaching initiative www.redbarncoaching.com

Would you like to read about nourishment in all its guises twice a week? We issue ‘Nourishing Conversations’ to our subscribers every Monday and Thursday, click here to subscribe by email or if you prefer to use an RSS reader you will find the orange chicklet below..

The Red Barn Cooperative

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